I was listening to a news program the other day and was shocked by how many billions of dollars we spend on war. Then I became very curious. I wondered: how much do we spend on building peace? Our relationships are getting worse because we are more invested in fighting each other and less invested in building peace…
Infidelity happens for plenty of reasons. None of them good ones. It happens because of 1. ego or 2. stupidity or 3. disconnection. Or because of 4. smugness, 5. ignorance, 6. a widening ache, 7. an emptiness or 8. the need to know what else is there. Infidelity happens because of 9. arrogance, 10. a lack…
I think we look at love all wrong! Especially when we get hurt. We blame love. But love doesn’t hurt us. Someone who doesn’t know how to love hurt us, and we get confused between the two. I also think that after we’ve been hurt by something that what wasn’t love we build cages around…
I want to thank you—for all the support and belief you’ve shown me this year. It has meant the world to me and I deeply appreciate you. I am feeling extraordinarily grateful to be able to share my thoughts, fears, successes, confusion and other exciting experiences with you. It’s been a hard year! We’ve seen hearts…
After the initial parabola of passion, infidelity can be a crashing into a particular kind of hell. A roller-coaster ride that burns our heart. Infidelity scalds us with guilt and grief in the after-shock of transcendent bliss. In virtually every marriage code in virtually every society, infidelity is unequivocally prohibited. In a lot of places…
We live in a culture that is skeptical and talks cynically about love relationships as if it can be compartmentalized into a neat and unchanging … static life. Best-selling books with titles like, “Getting the Love You Want,” mirror a fast-food culture where love and relationships are commodities that can be ordered, gotten, or kept. We use…
I believe your relationship can thrive! I believe your relationship can be what you want it to be. Fifty percent of our challenges in relationships are simply due to a lack of skills. This is especially true if we’ve never seen a competent, successful relationship. Have you? Most of us probably didn’t learn those skills in…
Imago relationship therapy (Imago is the Latin word for Image) is a cutting edge, transformational, relational model that helps couples restore connection, rediscover aliveness and joy and amplify the positive rather than the difficulties. Imago also teaches couples how to be empathetic and vulnerable. Oh … no, the “V” word. Unfortunately culture misguides us into thinking…
When we give someone the gift of forgiveness, it allows us to release our hurts and disappointments—having digested our grief about them. When we forgive, we “give for” ourself and those who hurt us. We move on, letting go of what harmed or offended us. Forgiveness does not mean blindly walking back into a…