What does it mean to be human? This is a frightening question these days. Wouldn’t it be easier to stay on the surface of things and medicate ourselves rather than deal with stimulation, titillation or unpredictability in relationships; with whatever it is we do that allows the present reality to be produced over and over…
Yael and I actually do possess the capacity to empathize with each other’s intentions and behavior, but it was a capacity we failed entirely to draw on that horrible, terrible, very bad morning. Even the best relationships, at times, fail to draw on this capacity; especially when our brains are “Hijacked” in conflict. Why? Why…
And I behaved in a way that is less than who I am. Yael and I don’t have children so our mornings are usually serene and consist of prayer and mediation; separately (and sometimes together), and getting Niles up, our 4 ½ year old Green-Cheek Conure. Getting Niles up means moving him from his sleep…
Do you sometimes have trouble seeing how your behavior impacts others? Do you rage at your partner and after you calm down apologize and brush it off by saying, “That was my alcoholic/addict behavior?” Do you have trouble communicating your fears, disappointments and desires to your partner? Do you obsess about your ex-partner’s and your…
The relational paradigm is a shift in thinking. It shifts our perspective from seeing a world made up of things, to seeing a world that is open and made up primarily of relationships. It tells us that a deeper level of reality exist beyond what we can articulate. A place where everything is connected to…
It is ugly! It hurts; it’s toxic; it’s destructive. It threatens our joy and it gets in the way of us deeply connecting with others. When I was gripped by it, I wanted to die because it made me feel that I wasn’t good enough. So for years I was engulfed by it. Men walk…
We all come into relationships with two opposing fears: the fear of being abandoned, and the fear of getting too close or intimacy. These fears will get triggered when our relationship becomes more involved or we make a commitment. The closer and more intimate we become, the higher the stakes. We not only become afraid…
The purpose of romantic love is to bond us with another so that we begin to experience the inevitable tension of the power struggle … and stay committed to the process of healing and growth. A relationship that is going through a power struggle is, in a sense, like a house divided against itself. It…
The “Couple’s Pilgrimage: Receiving a Renewed Sense of Love” is a new couples seminar that is a fusion between my private intensive sessions and the couple’s workshop. I will be presenting this One-day learning opportunity on Saturday, July 22, 2017 from 10:00am – 5:00pm at the Hope Artiste Village, 1005 Main St. Suite 1208 Pawtucket,…