Sometimes men find themselves struggling to fully express their thoughts and feelings when attending couples therapy with their wives or romantic partners for several reasons. First, there’s often a fear of vulnerability. This is understandable. Many men are socialized to appear strong and in control which can make it difficult for them to express emotions…
The decision to distance ourselves from our family rarely comes easily or suddenly. Instead, family estrangement typically emerges from years of pain, conflict, unacknowledged trauma and attempts to maintain relationships that ultimately prove emotionally unsustainable. The causes of such separations run deep, often interweaving multiple layers of hurt, misunderstanding, and irreconcilable differences. I’ve been there.…
Hearts are full across our nation and the world—holding everything from despair, sadness, deep anguish and worry to profound relief and optimism. Each person’s feelings, whether of distress or hope, deserve to be honored and heard. Writing helps me to process my emotions and make sense of what seemingly doesn’t make sense to me. So…
Delving into self-exploration paves the way for genuine living (and loving). This introspective journey involves unraveling the complex tapestry of our personalities and beliefs, reconnecting us with the essence of who we are. That part of us that is unbroken and whole. Through this process of peeling the layers of the onion, we unearth dormant…
Folks, we are living in a polarized era sautéed with suspicion. You and I not only know this, we feel it — everyday. It can be difficult to discern the true from the false, and the energy it takes to do the daily mental calisthenics of fact and motive checking is colossal. While political polarization and divides…
Affairs today manifest in more insidious forms than tête-à-têtes with cryptic strangers. In our digital age, the temptation to emotionally or physically stray often begins benignly online. Messaging a friendly ex on social media. Text chemistry with an alluring coworker. The anonymity and accessibility that the internet provides lets flirtation escalate without anyone leaving home.…
What does it mean to be human? This is a frightening question these days. Wouldn’t it be easier to stay on the surface of things and medicate ourselves rather than deal with stimulation, titillation or unpredictability in relationships; with whatever it is we do that allows the present reality to be produced over and over…
Do you sometimes have trouble seeing how your behavior impacts others? Do you rage at your partner and after you calm down apologize and brush it off by saying, “That was my alcoholic/addict behavior?” Do you have trouble communicating your fears, disappointments and desires to your partner? Do you obsess about your ex-partner’s and your…
The relational paradigm is a shift in thinking. It shifts our perspective from seeing a world made up of things, to seeing a world that is open and made up primarily of relationships. It tells us that a deeper level of reality exist beyond what we can articulate. A place where everything is connected to…
It is ugly! It hurts; it’s toxic; it’s destructive. It threatens our joy and it gets in the way of us deeply connecting with others. When I was gripped by it, I wanted to die because it made me feel that I wasn’t good enough. So for years I was engulfed by it. Men walk…