Affairs: A Process for Healing Both Partners – Part II I do not rescue couples. I teach them not to be afraid. “Even though we walk through the valley of the shadow of death,” I teach the them not to fear pain, not to fear the emotions and to just let things run their course.…
From time to time something really touches me deeply. It just takes my breath away and brings me to tears. This was one of those moments. I checked in with several couples who coached with me to see how they were doing. I discovered that most of them were still feeling hopeful, excited and using…
As adults, if we become frustrated more than twice over the same thing, we can apply the 90/10 formula, which means 10% of the energy of the frustration is in the present, and 90% of the energy is in the past. If 90% of that frustration energy was not in the past, we would notice…
Several months after Yael and I put marriage on the horizon, the relationship began to feel like an absolute nightmare, even dangerous at times. She push all my buttons. I pushed back in fear and anger and then she would retreat into her turtle shell. When I got angry, I would also do something we…
Dear Loving Out Loud Community! I want to take the opportunity to tell you about my relationship journey with my spouse Yael. We recently celebrated five years of marriage. We met on match.com eight years ago. Yes … an online dating success story, indeed. When we met, Yael lived in Boston, MA., and interestingly, I…
One of the biggest FALLACIES out there is that, in order to create a lasting love relationship, all you have to do is find someone who’s “successful” and who has less “baggage” than you do. Forget it … because it’s just not true! I used to think that way myself. I also spent a lot…
Imagine standing on the edge of the sidewalk on a busy road. Instead of waiting until it’s clear, you purposely step out as a speeding car approaches. The car hits you, but you survive. Now imagine doing this repeatedly and surviving. Yes, you would survive, but you would have external scars as well as untold…
Many people are still enamored with the idea that being successful in relationships is as easy as putting two healthy people together and hoping that will be enough to make the relationship work. As savvy, sophisticated, relational thinkers, however, we know this just isn’t true. We know that place in a relationship where the same…
I appreciate you and I am looking forward to an amazing year together-filled with life, love and possibilities. Ready to start 2015 with a new perspective on relationships? Click here: http://lovingoutloud2014.com/relationshipreinvention/ After years of heartbreak, infidelity, stubbornness, fear, confusion and following the wrong guidance … I needed to change how I was looking at relationships…