A lot of us get into relationships only to find ourselves becoming someone we do not recognize. We become mean to our partners and we don’t like the way it feels. We also don’t like the way the other person is treating us. In moments of quiet and solitude, we think this is not who we are and we are baffled by some of the things we say and do.
We argue with our partners; trying to “one up” them and/or shutting down. We battle to try and figure out who’s right and who’s to blame for this nightmare that’s turning us into these unrecognizable creatures.
We blame because we don’t want to admit that this is who we really are because before we got into THIS relationship, we were solid and healthy. We were aligned with our own values and goodness. We were thoughtful, kind, caring and empathic. Then we got into a relationship and the things we thought we had gotten over surfaced at a level we never thought possible.
We conveniently tell ourselves that our relationship will get better when our partner get their act together. So we latch on to that as our solution, and spend our energy proving it to our partner and anyone else who will listen to us.
What we don’t realize is that our partner has simply expose another layer of what is already unhealed in us.We come to our relationships wounded in many ways that we are unaware of and we only become aware of what is unhealed in us in a relationship. But we don’t want to accept that. We don’t want to accept that we have blind-spots. And as a result, we burn our relationships to the ground. There is only so much belittling, pain, arguing, going to bed angry and frustration our we can take before we are so broken that we have no energy to do what is needed to repair.
Let me ask you a serious question. Do you want to keep your relationship?
Do you want to learn how to be different in the relationship?
Did you begin your relationship believing there was so much potential, and now you feel like there is no way you can get back there?
I teach couples how to restore their connection in my private intensives, workshops and relationship education sessions. I help you get to the root of the problem, move beyond that nasty impasse so you can see the true potential, i.e., the potential for your relationship and your potential as individuals.
I am offering workshops in Los Angeles and in Providence in the coming months. Click above so you can see the possibilities awaiting you and your relationship.
