Couples intensive therapy is a new, cutting edge alternative to weekly, one-hour therapy. The Imago couples private intensive shifts away from the traditional, medicalized, diagnostic paradigm to a more holistic, experiential, integrative, strength-based, dialogical model based on Imago Relationship Therapy, principles and practices. The couples intensive is specifically designed to help transform the symptoms of relationship pain and frustrations by exploring the causes and conditions that created the pain and frustration. The intensive model allows couples to examine conflicts at the root cause because they have time to relax and explore difficulties in a calm and peaceful manner without the stress of time running out. The intensive is structured and designed to promote emotional safety which is crucial when exploring the emotional and psychological patterns and cycles, hurts, and bad conversational habits. I use the word intensive, but intensives are not overwhelming. That would defeat the purpose. The curriculum combines therapy, psycho-education, writing, reflection, and an experience of the new relational skills; skills that inspires and motivates couples to be their best selves, to bring their best selves to their marriage/relationship and do the work they need to do to grow together.
How Could a Private Intensive Help Us?
Relationships are difficult and conflict is painful. I want to assure you of this: Conflict in your relationship does not mean you are with the wrong person. In fact, it means the opposite! Conflict means there is pain in the relationship that needs to be tended to. You are with an incompatible person — someone whose world is different from yours — and it is very likely that you have not accepted this wholeheartedly yet. However, this is the person with whom you will grow the most, in the direction you most need to grow. Thus, heated conflicts create negative energy. Negative energy amplifies the anxiety rupture and couples experience disconnection. What happens after the rupture becomes a memory that colors future interactions. Intensives helps couples to unraveling their difficulties and understand their problematic behaviors, attitudes and actions and how to do it differently.
Couples learn how to recognize and protect the Space Between — avoiding the toxins and negative patterns that increase anxiety and heighten defenses — while amplifying affirmations. By focusing on safety, you and your partner can begin to connect. And with connection come full aliveness and joy and peace.
Two Important Purposes of the Couples Intensive
1. To introduce you to an entirely new kind of relationship called A CONSCIOUS PARTNERSHIP, which is distinguished by three features: collaboration, cooperation and co-creation beyond differences. This new relationship replaces the old relationship that is characterized by control, fear, competition, domination and a winner-take-all attitude. 2 Learn a new technology that helps sustain a conscious partnership. IMAGO INTENTIONAL DIALOGUE is a new way of talking and listening that transcends polarization by helping connect through difference. The regular practice of this new technology and integrating it into your life will move you and your partner toward a sustained experience of connecting, joy and full aliveness.
Putting the Relationship First!
Relationships matter! And the quality of our relationships matters absolutely. We move away from the “I” (individualism) to the “We” (relationship) paradigm. To do that we need to put relationships first. We were all born in relationship, injured in relationship and are healed only in relationship. While this has always been true, it has never been in personal and public consciousness. It is nothing less than a paradigm shift! The well-being of the whole ultimately serves the interests of the self, not the other way around!
Communication
The core skill and tool we use is the the Imago Intentional Dialogue a 3-step structured process designed to create emotional safety. Intentional Dialogue allows two people talk without criticism, listen without judgment and connect beyond their differences. Talking is the most dangerous thing most people do, and listening is the most infrequent or non-existent. Learning how to talk without criticism and to listen without reacting negatively makes conversations safe and connection possible.
How Long are Private Intensives?
Intensives are 1- Day, 2–Days or 3-Days. The intensives can be consecutive days or scattered. Intensives usually begin at 10am – 6:00pm. There are breaks in between as well as shorter breaks.
Can Things Really Change in 1, 2 or 3 Days?
Absolutely. I’ve heard couples say that they achieved more in a 1-Day private intensive than in years of weekly therapy. Couples can get unstuck in 1- Day of focused positive attention to their relationship, and they do this by letting their guards down, ridding themselves of the negativity and opening to talking and listening to each other in a respectful way. Their new experiences of themselves, their relationship and the understanding of their capacity to create positive change is what brings renewed hope, meaning and real purpose into their lives. How great is that!
Who Can Intensives Help?
I work with ALL couples in various stages of the life cycle and the intensive format will meet the needs of most couples. Whether you’ve been together for years unable to overcome certain issues — or you’re a new couple wanting tools that ensure lasting happiness — working intensively can help you put your attitude and behaviors on a positive track.
- Married and Unmarried Couples
- Engaged Couples
- Couples Seeking a Check-Up or To Reconnect
- Couples On the Brink of Divorce or in High Emotional Distress
- Couples Who Filed for Divorce and/or Considering Getting Back Together
- Couples Not Suited for the Intensive — Any of the following conditions need to be discussed with me first: physical abuse, threat/fear of violence, history of harm to self/other, suicidal/homicidal thoughts, a major mental illness, ongoing current affair.
What is Cost of an Intensive?
The 1-Day private intensive (one couple/one therapist) is $1400. The 2-Day private intensive is $2100 and 3-Day private is proportionately priced. A 10% discounts is available for practitioners, healers and teachers and for those who have attended a “Getting the Love You Want Couples Weekend workshop. A 50% deposit is required to schedule the intensive and the balance is due two days prior to the intensive. Once I receive your deposit you will receive a written confirmation email which has all the details for your intensive along with my cancellation policy. ***Please note: Intensives are not covered by insurances. Click here to read testimonials from other couples who have attended couples intensives.
Is it Worth it?
As you consider how valuable this experience could be for your relationship think about what you’re trying to save, improve, strengthen or heal –your marriage/committed relationship, your family, your sanity, your spirit! Improving your marriage is a very smart way to save money. If your relationship gets worse you could be paying far more than the cost of intensive therapy for divorce attorneys, cost of moving, therapy, child support, and more. The financial costs of relationship deterioration are enormous and the family costs are even bigger and longer lasting. Your marriage deserves the best possible help. Call today: 401-782-7899
